Our English Lab

[Jerda]

My earliest memory... let me think. I think it’s when I was crawling in a bedroom in my first house in Florence. My parents switched my bedroom with theirs when I was 1 year, so I should have been younger. I also remember them mimicking an airplane while feeding me with a spoon, so yes, around one year old.

If you decided to furnish a room of your house in a completely new way, which one and how? Would you fill your living room with plants for example, or repaint your bedroom with drawings, would you place a Jacuzzi in the bathroom ..?

[Jerda]

It was 1979, New York Times columnist William Safire made up a list of rules of correct writing, called "Fumblerules of grammar".
These rules are humorously presented, since they are self-contradictory. Umberto Eco later made such a list with Italian grammar, but he actually heavily copied his colleague from the States.

It must be remarked that such rules are debatable, since even those that are not merely rules of good writing, even those that aim to be are grammar instructions, such as "never split an infinitive" are not always followed.
This might bring to some consideration about "prescrictive grammar" versus "descriptive grammar", which we may discuss at a later moment if there is some interest.

However, these are the

Fumblerules of Grammar
by William Safire

1. Remember to never split an infinitive.

2. A preposition is something never to end a sentence with.

3. The passive voice should never be used.

4. Avoid run-on sentences they are hard to read.

5. Don't use no double negatives.

6. Use the semicolon properly, always use it where it is appropriate; and never where it isn't.

7. Reserve the apostrophe for it's proper use and omit it when its not needed.

8. Do not put statements in the negative form.

9. Verbs has to agree with their subjects.

10. No sentence fragments.

11. Proofread carefully to see if you words out.

12. Avoid commas, that are not necessary.

13. If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.

14. A writer must not shift your point of view.

15. Eschew dialect, irregardless.

16. And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.

17. Don't overuse exclamation marks!!!

18. Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.

19. Hyphenate between sy-llables and avoid un- necessary hyphens.

20. Write all adverbial forms correct.

21. Don't use contractions in formal writing.

22. Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.

23. It is incumbent on us to avoid archaisms.

24. If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.

25. Steer clear of incorrect forms of verbs that have snuck in the language.

26. Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.

27. Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.

28. Never, ever use repetitive redundancies.

29. Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.

30. If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times, resist hyperbole.

31. Also, avoid awkward or affected alliteration.

32. Don't string too many prepositional phrases together unless you are walking through the valley of the shadow of death.

33. Always pick on the correct idiom.

34. "Avoid overuse of 'quotation "marks."'"

35. The adverb always follows the verb.

36. Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague; they're old hat; seek viable alternatives.

[follemente]

Really funny!

My earliest memory... let me think. I think is when I was crawling in a bedroom in my first house in Florence. My parents switched my bedroom with theirs when I was 1 year, so I should have been younger. I also remember them mimicking an airplane while feeding me with a spoon, so yes, around one year old.

If you decided to furnish a room of your house in a completely new way, which one and how? Would you fill your living room with plants for example, or repaint your bedroom with drawings, would you place a Jacuzzi in the bathroom ..?

I would furnish my living room. I would save the ancient and very original cupboard, but I would change the table, the chairs and the shelfs. All the walls must be white, because I adore this colour non-colour. I would change also the paintings and I’d rather put white curtains. Yes, I would fill the room with plants.
I wouldn’t like Jacuzzi in the bathroom, I prefer the shower, because I don’t stay in the bath much time.

What was the last book you read?

[Jerda]

I recently bought an anthology of English literature, The Norton Anthology of English literature. But being an Anthology, I'm not reading chapter by chapter, I'm reading authors I want to dig into in the moment. The aim would be to read it all, but it's in six volumes I'm not sure if it will ever happen.

I recently read "The brain that changes itself" by Norman Doidge, an essay about psychology and neuroscience. Very well done, I liked it a lot.
I'm rarely disappointed by a book, since if it doesn't hook me in a reasonable time, I just stop reading it.

Do you like comedies? If yes, which directors and films do you like most?

[follemente]

Sorry, I didn’t watch many comedies in my life, I prefer tragedies. There are only a few things that make me laugh. However, I saw many comedies at the theatre, by Cristina Comencini or Oscar Wilde or Carlo Goldoni and others.

Talk about a time when you got ill or had an accident while travelling or arrived home from a trip and had a surprise.

[Jerda]

It happened once in Morocco, the second time that I went there, with my wife. We lodged in a Hotel in Agadir. I once hired a car, to go to Marrakesh.

I first went over a chain with spikes that the police used to place across the street. They usually motion with a torch to make cars stop, but not knowing this I ran on the chain. Nothing bad, I changed the tyre, but after, while going back to Agadir, an entire wheel detatched from the car.

Being deserted and soft, the car didn't have serious problems, but there was no soul in sight, no cars, no wheel to change and it was really cold, as usual in a semi-desertic area with no air humidity after the sunset.
I had to ask for a ride, a truck stopped but it was going to Marrakesh. Better than nothing I thouhgt. The driver was really scary and while speaking with my wife, she motioned me to look at the him, with petrified eyes. He was smoking a pipe with hashish and was leaning with his head on the window, apparently sleeping. I called him, he said it's normal.

Then he stopped in a parking, we asked other truck drivers if there was anyone going to Agadir. One of them was answering something like yes, but our driver started screaming at him. I couldn't understand well and the other driver went away. I couldn't engage our driver also, maybe he just wanted to be rewarded, but we needed to go to Agadir. Afterwards the trip started to have nightmarish tones, with the marocains we met during the night always watching at my wife, me trying to figure out what I could grab to fight, if they became abusive. They looked so.

In the end we paid another driver to bring us back to Agadir and arrived at the hotel at 8 in the morning. Being considered rich, as all tourists and with my wife while being with nasty and unclear people made me really scared, especially because we were two.
The day after i returned the keys to the rental and described them where the car was. I complained beacuse of the shitty car they gave us and of course paid no extra for that.

I remember that you have a kindle, if I am correct. Has it changed your reading habits? Have you read more books or less, after having bought it?

[follemente]

Very interesting story, Jerda!

Yes, I have a kindle and I am happy with it. The most beautiful thing is that I can buy and read the book I desire whenever I want, also at midnight.
I don't know if I had read more books with kindle. It's better not to read too demanding books: for instance, I didn't finish one book, M il figlio del secolo, because there were too many informations and date which I couldn't check and revise and remember, because it isn't easy to go back with kindle.

Now, in the quarantine, it was very comfortable buying books when the bookshops were closed.

Do you cycle in your town? How safe do you feel?

[Jerda]

Morning!
Yes, I mainly use my bike to move in the city. I bought it months ago and it's the best way to enjoy Amsterdam. Everyone feels very safe cycling in the town at every hour, violent crimes are very rare and usually involve fights among felons and the center, the redlight zone mainly.
Cycling is one of the main reasons why Amsterdamers are always slim and in shape; an average person uses it for hours and often goes running or to the gym, too. In this period the city is gorgeous and teens and adults often meet by bike to go sit along the leeves of the canals or the green areas. Everyone has a kit for basic repairs such as a flat tyre, and a raincoat in case of sudden rain that frequently happen expecially in fall and winter. Many bikes have a box in front of them, to bring grocery bags or children. A lot of bikes also have an alarm, it is very easy to make it go off while parking your own bike if you inadvertently hit them.

Tell me about a country that you have dreamt to visit for long, but yet you haven't. Do you have any destination of your dreams? It must be a place you never visited before

[Jerda]

As many people may have noticed, in English They can be used as a neutral form to refer to somebody that has been just mentioned in a sentence, but without specifying the name or gender, so it is not clear wether to add he or she. It's called Singular They.
It applies to any derivative form of they, such as them, their and so on.
Let's see some examples:

They told me that an employee is already waiting for me. I'll ask them as I arrive

Somebody has forgotten their book here. Let us put on a shelf where it's visibile.

A professional should never share their information like this.


Being English a language that changes with time, like any other, this use has been criticized in the past, as it rose. But here it is useful to make a distinction between prescriptive and descriptive grammar.

When a language changes, it is because people start using different words that are incorrect for classic grammar, when they are not neologisms at all. Linguists of course have a fundamental function to remember rules and prevent oversimplification of the language, that would mean a pauperization. However, this role can be interpreted in a more or less conservative way.
Descriptive grammar refers to an observation of the language itself, leaving to the linguist just the minimal function as above. Prescriptive grammar is more bound to the rules. They are not separated worlds of course, so in the same environment I can be more conservative about a rule and less about others, with different motivation. This enriches the debate over the language.

Some rules, often taught in foreign schools such as Italian, has brought to some funny aspects.

For example the word "good-bye". People in England very very rarely use it to say "bye bye" or "see you". It sounds more like a farewell.
It's not incorrect, but without being used to listen to real conversation for a long time, living in an English-speaking country, it's better to avoid to say so: it would be felt as overused and heavy.

Much and many: as we have been taught, they are to be used in negative or interrogative sentence only. Said like this, it is complete bullshit. First the are used with positive sentences normally, especially many. There are other rules that can be searched, even if in most websites they are reported wrongly. Not being the purpose of this post I'll leave it for a another occasion, however always be wary when applying some rules that have been learnt at school and never more heard of.

Another one is never split an infinitive. I prefer not to do so, but it's not really a rule. Even Star Trek mission was "to boldly go where no-one has been before" who are we to contradict them?

[follemente]

You post very interesting things, Jerda!

I have to think a little before answering.

[Jerda]

Thank you! And take your time, Madly!

[follemente]

I would like to go in Poland and visit Warsaw, the country’s capital, Poznań, the seat of Poland’s first bishopric, Gdańsk, one of the most active ports on the busy Baltic Sea; and Kraków with his historic centre.
I would like to visit also the Great Masurian Lake, with his verdant land of rolling hills dotted with countless lakes, little farms, forest and small towns.

I’d rather not go to Auschwitz, because I’m very sensitive: I had already been in the past in Prague, in the Jewish ghetto, where are some synagogues: in one of them there are stamped the names of all the people who died in concentration camps: I couldn’t stay there, because I was crying and I felt very bad.

And you, which country would you like to visit?

[Jerda]

Good morning!
One for all, I'd like to visit New Zealand. It's a hell of a faraway place to visit, but it must be really gorgeous with its mix of different landscapes and the mountains overlooking the sea. I've always been attracted by cold places, so I guess it's more because of the mountain, than the seaside. Other places would be Canada or some other nothern place. I do enjoy sunny places, but if I went there, I would be in the shadow or in water most of the time, since I do not stand hot weather: my hands are always boiling hot, any degree beyond 22-23 degrees makes any further more and more of a torture. Also, a blinding strong light makes me scowl all the time and not enjoy the atmosphere. As an example that anyone can acknowledge: visiting a city is not optimal with strong light, since this burns the colours, prevents watching beautiful views. This applies to anywhere for me, so even natural places with short vegetation made mainly by bushes will not intrigue me for more than a morning, unless there is some shadowy angle, some high vegetation. Having a shadowy area makes me stand any area, unless my trip mates do not try to drag me to the sun. "He, Massimo, come over here! It's beautiful, it's so hot here, we are sunbathing. Come on paley! "Yeah yeha, wait for me, I'm coming, sure enough"
Another funny aspect is, if we are two and are sitting outside a bar, we need to find a table where my fellow travelers can sit at the sun and I in the shadow. I'll never understand those who can eat in complete sunlight, when it's summer strong light of course. Apart from that, I go and hopefully will go again to the beach, but not all places are right for me if there is not a local shadow to enjoy during the hottest hous of the day.

You're very interested in studying English. The reasons that bring people to study or improve English can be very diverse, each of them has a mentally set goal level. What level of skill are you ideally aiming to? Would you stop once reaching it or would you go on, even if the main purpose has been achieved?

[Jerda]

English is a very peculiar language. It has without a doubt a German root, but the simplification over the centuries (no more declinations, one way to form plural only, with a few exceptions...) and especially the influence from Ecclesiastical Latin and French, made it actually a language with an ever-debated nature.

There are many points of view on the matter, but after reading different sources and arguments, I personally think that it is definitely a German language.

Let's see the arguments in favour of a half-latin language first:

- Half or more words in the dictionaries are Latin-rooted.
- After year 1066, French dominion over British Isles (Great Britain and Ireland, but never call them British Isles if there is an Irishman around! ) brought many changes to English language and an injection of new words.

However, this thesis is overly simplified. Let's take the Dictionaries for example.

All dictionaries, Oxford and Cambridge to name the top-notch of the category, have a broad part dedicated to latin-origin words.
This is undeniably true, but we need to watch better what this difference is made of.

Dictionaries must sell of course. One huge first feature that the average buyer watches is the number of words. It's not the best parameter, but it's all that most people have to judge.

Not all words should be appropriately be put in a dictionary. Let us just consider areas like Medicine, Science, Astronomy. They rely heavily on latin words, since even neologisms are created starting from Latin or greek

Of course, no one has a doubt that a very specialistic word, the name o a new molecule, of a new star, should not reside in a Dictionary. On the other hand, words like Betelgeuse (a star) or Stethoscope are so common to be put in.

Most others should stay in a Dictionary for technical terms. The shadowy area between the first and the latter is a grey area where publishers like to play with, pushing new words and have more overall terms in their dictionary. Who wouldn't buy a dictionary rather than another if one has 120.000 terms and the other 95.000, and no further criteria to judge?

Letting aside this, we must consider how often Latin-origin words are actually used by in everyday non-formal situations. 95% of the hundred of most common-used words are German, so Anglo-Saxon. Same for 85% of the most common thousand words:
Door, Father, House, Mother (the latter resembles to Mater, but we must consider that German and Neolatin languages are both Indo-European and many similarities are due to their common origin, not to later influences), spoon, chicken, horse are Anglo-Saxon, therefore Germanic.

The history of French conquer of England has made so, that a huge number or French people entered Britain and ruled it, but they were and remained aristocrats, pretty much separated from the common folks.

So, in modern English words about power, boureocracy, high fashion, state administration, often have a Latin root, typical of the aristocracy. On the other hand everyday words as seen, have a stong and steady German origin.

Even more important, every matter about grammar and syntax has always remained deeply Germanic.
The way that plurals, passive forms, verbs conjugation are built have nothing to do with a latin language. As all Germanic language, it has only two verb tenses, present and past, while future is always a composite form. This is one of the strongest objections to English as a half-neolatin language in my opinion.

It is certainly true that somewhere along the shift between Old English (spoken between VI and XI century) and Middle English, in a brief period anyway, English got simplified and lost downdrifts and all but one ways to form plural. It has not to be taken as a poor language by the way; the richness of English is made of idiomatic and phrasal verbs and expressions. There are also lots of synonims for most words. When reaching an advanced level, one of the best exercises to improve your own "vocabulary" is picking a word, and try to recall as many synonims as possible, noticing the different shades of meaning that one has respect to another.

If I should suggest three books to someone who wants to learn a good English, I would suggest a small grammar, a good Dictionary, and a huge phrasal and idiomatic terms textbook.
Even normal forms are not always used. I will and I'll have the same meaning, but saying I'll help you or I will help you is very different.

English is full of potential and has a musicality that makes it really fit to music, poetry and evocative writing, way more than Italian because it's more fluid (NB: notice this more fluid: it's a language with loooots of exceptions for any meaning that we want to highlight ).

In Italian, great song writers such as Guccini, must sacrifice a lot of musicality and harmony in order to give lyrics a priority. In English it is much easier. This is what makes English so preferable to me

[Jerda]

Internet is a neverending source to improve one's English. There are countless texts of any kind to be read and translated.
However, without the right tools, it can be daunting to switch tab or window, go to google translate, check and go back to the text searching where you arrived.

Even tools like google translate are often heavy, when you just want the translation of one single word without losing track of where you were and thus interrupting the reading.

A multibrowser extension that has changed a lot the way I use English text is ImTranslator.

It's maybe one of the many available, when I installed it there were a few that did it though. By installing and setting one time the output language as Italian, it will be just a matter of double-clicking on that word to see a small pop-up window with the most common translations like in a dictionary and not only one, that is typical of google translate.
This latter can be used to translate whole pages, as well as ImTranslator but I prefer Google translate.

I have no clue of the current availability of other extension, but I strongly advise to find one like ImTranslator, that lets you have a translation while reading, without changing page or tab. I opens brand new ways for English reading and learning.